I`m just 14yo. I`ve been through things in my life that thanks God didn`t kill me and I have became stronger. But there are things that you will learn in life just going through out because is not a manual to prepare you for you to know what to do.
I`m amaze how Luc hold on to God every single day of his life or at least since we meet. I can`t believe how tender he is. How comprehensive, patient and understanding. He touch the most deepest fibers of my self as a human being. That part we have that we can`t see but we can feel. He told me "Andy, I will love you in any way you want. You can love me in any way you want. I`ll be your boyfriend if you want to. I will go with you as far as I haven`t go with no boy in my life regarding your sexual preference but I will not ever have sex with you in any way and I want you to know this. If I do, I will hurt you and my self and our relationship will not last. You can touch me, kiss me, whatever you want but not in a sexual way. I love you and I`m praying to God for wisdom to show you what a friend and a brother is because you`re too young and I think you`re just confuse about what love is, and I want to talk to my Dad because this have to start with your Dad. I know you`re crazy about your Dad. Please, don`t forget this conversation." And he did. I`m not in love with Luc even I thought I did got a crush on him at the beginning, but he taught me what a friend and a brother love is and now is when I love him in a way is not possible for me to describe. I just know is love and so beautiful.
I remember when Luc show that video to Rob. I was there.
The last five days of Rob`s life his Dad and Luc and his parents didn`t leave the bedroom. There were a Doctor and two nurses.
Rob was laying on Luc and Luc were just caressing his back from his shoulders all the way down. It was the only way Ro can have some sleep and stop moaning out of pain, because he didn`t want to get so sedated that wasn`t able to even talk to his Dad and Luc. Luc peed in an urinal and used a commode to do #2 without getting out of Rob`s sight. Luc didn`t took a shower in those last five days and his Mum feed him with just shakes because he can`t pass not solid food. Luc ask his Dad if it was the end and if there were nothing else science was able to do and uncle Lucas hugged him and told him that there were nothing else to do and to be strong for Rob. Luc were pale and so thin. The day before the end I thought if Luc was going to made it and praying to God to give him strength. When Rob pass Luc have to be shot in order for him to let go of Rob. Luc told me that when Rob stop breathing, he felt a pain so deep and overwhelming that he thought he will go in a respiratory arrest because after the first scream he did he wasn`t able to breath again and passed out. I just can imagine but I`m not Luc, just him knows how it was. Just him is able to understand about that kind of pain when others are going through a situation like that, he can relate because he went through a so big pain and even this every body mourn different.
I`m grateful because I meet Rob. Luc told me that he never heard Rob saying a word expressing hate towards the person who hurt him. Rob never complain to God, he was worried about his health but just ask Him for strength. Rob live his short life loving God and every body he were able to reach. I never have meet a so brave kid like him. I`m crying right now, but for happy memories, for being able to see the change God have helped Luc to made. He is happy and in love. He is our big bro and we can`t be more proud of him. We adore him. Is late but I haven`t be able to get no sleep because I`ve been thinking about lots of adjusting we all have been doing and because I have no school today. I`ve been in bed watching Luc sleeping, blogging and thanking God for how good things are going now.
I really love my bro. I`m so happy for having him in my life. Is been hard on him but I love his courage. He is brave. He never give up. Thanks God because you`re the only one who knows how much I love him and how happy I am because he is moving forward.
I love my parents and the whole big family we are. I can say that I`m living a happy life and I`m grateful for it. I am happy.
My life is happier and better in all meanings because you bro.
I will always have you in my heart too.
Thank you!!
With love,
Andy
Luc said: You give me no choice but add to all this beauty. You`re a rainbow. The most beautiful one. So, I touch the most deepest fibers as human you have? Cool, because you just have been doing the same to me, I have to compose my self and stop tearing down out of love and happiness to be able to add this, and our love is so big and beautiful as God it self. You leave me breathless and amaze. You have learn what is to love another male as a friend and a brother without have anything to do with your sexual preference and this have made me incredible happy. Thank you for exist Andy. You overdose me with love all the time. You are one of the reasons I`m alive and moving on. Our love will keep growing and is my hope we will share our lives for long. I love you Andy, with all I got as a human.
Luc
6 comments:
Andy
Your posts are the bread of life, more so because you put the feelings where it is felt and not simply read. I made a good comment about you in Luc's post to bring this point to a head, because I am amazed that some one your age can pluck words out of the air and place them so majestically in a well written script. I'll have to keep my eye on you, I might learn the secrets of your trade to better my own influences upon life's dull moments.
The understanding between yourself and Luc is the most important part of any friendship, it has to be common ground otherwise there would be conflict and wouldn't last for long. By accepting each others friendship whether by love or companionship, the bond is sealed on trust within that relationship. You have both acknowledged that it is not a sexual thing, so loving each other is formally a greeting or awareness that you both feel at ease to be together as friends. As you pass through your teen years you'll find a miss irresistible just like Luc has done, and this is when happiness hits you between the eyes. It takes a movement in your life to trigger a sexual orientation you will take, and at your age you are in a experimental stage that most teenagers face on the route to adulthood, it's just like a good meal or a bad one, you know what you prefer.
Take care.
Andy,
Thank You!! This is one of the most beautiful post I have ever read!! Your love is so deep and awesome. For someone your age, you have a most beautiful relationship with God. I am so honored to know you and be called "Pa" by you. Thank you again for being you!!
God bless,
I love you,
Pa
omg Vic, you have me all teary eyes and red face. People say I`m too mature for my age but I really just say things as I see them and I think suffering in life will made two things, or kill you, or you will became stronger. Rob show me lots about this and Luc`s love have been something out of this world for me. He taught me that I don`t have to be gay to hug and kiss another male out of love. He have taught me the most beautiful lesson about what is to love a friend and a brother. Thank you for your words Vic. Thank you so very much.
@Pa- I love you pa. Thank you.
I am a frined of Joe and i live in Corpus Christi Tx. I don't have the words to express how i feel. It is such a blessing to see a young person learning the true meaning of loving one another. i have come against much hate and predujice in my life not only being gay but being Transgender. it is so difficult to finde true love as you expressed it. I pray for God's will to be done in my life and i get depressed thinking that God may not have someone for me to share my life with. God has given my great compassion for my fellow man even though at times i fell all alone and no one cares. Thank you for your words and i pray that we all may finde peace in our lives. God Bless you and your family-lisa B.L
omg Lisa! than you so very much for take from your time and stopping by, is an honor for us. I will start praying to God that He cover you with his grace and mercy and you can find the person that will fill up that big hole you got in your heart and filled with tru love. That you heal and find happiness. You are a beautiful and unique creature because God doesn`t made crap, we are the ones who choose to do crap. Please, don`t feel rejected and hated because lots of good people loves you. meanwhile, would you accept a hug and a kiss from us? We are sending it with love.
Luc and Andy
@Lisa B L
Hi Lisa
The world is never a small place when you visit real friends on this blog, here you'll find people you can talk to and reap the comfort it gives you.
I've got a rule which you may like to use yourself, it goes like this---
(1) You are as good as you feel, so never take to heart what people think unless it's good.
(2) A nice smile will win you many friends, a grumpy looking mood will put them off.
(3) When you see yourself in a mirror say hi kid, you'll be surprised how good that makes you feel.
(4) And lastly, I'm sending you a hug because you are beautiful.
Goodnight from me.
Post a Comment