NO WONDER (by Lucas)

No wonder I open my eyes about 3:30AM, because I didn`t feel Andy in bed and saw him seating out side in the balcony. I went to him and can say he was crying. I ask and he told me "Lets put it this way, I just love you. Trust me, is just that". We went back to bed and I pass out sleep quick.
Now he is the one sleeping and I`m in the computer. He didn`t told me nothing bout the post he did, but then is when I understood.
I`ve been seating in here for bout 20 mins, unable to do nothing. I`m not crying, but tears have been rolling down my cheeks. Andy is too beautiful. He do things that I just kinda frost and just look at him. The thing is that I didn`t thought.........I will never have a relationship with some body else, as close as I did have with Ro. I`ve been so wrong. Andy is not close, is in my heart all ready! I swear, I don`t even know what to say to him. I really don`t. This time he have hit me deep.
I don`t know what to think bout my self tho. I`m scare. Scare to love so deep again. I am. But is done. I just did it again, and I think this is the why I`m so scare. I`m scare......to go through the pain I am going through again. I some times cry, thinking, what if one of my parents die? And even I`m so grateful to God for Andy, cus I am, at the same time I`m so scare. Have cross my mind if I`m screw from the the head, result of all the things I went through with Ro. Death is part of life. The only person who never die, is the one that have never born. Am I making sense? I don`t know why I get my self into this so early in the morning.
Andy:
           I really appreciate if you never again.........give any explanation to no body, because you want to express love to me. We talked bout this so long ago, that I doesn`t even remember. I love you and will love you, no matter which your sexual orientation is or will be. We clear this topic long time ago. I know you are doing it to protect me, because our sexual orientations are different, but not need to buddy. Don`t you worry bout it ever.
           Thanks for the love you feel for me.
           Thanks for express it to me through that so beautiful song. I believe you and know what you mean.
           You`re tender Andy.
           I just love you. Thanks for be who you are.
You got me. I surrender. I know that you have felt how scare I am and why. I know too, that you won`t give up on me. Thanks.
           See buddy? You conquer my heart with your love.......is yours Andy.....I know is in good hands. Thanks for ever.
           Yes, your love is beautiful buddy.

luc


I start this one around 6:15AM and is 8:07 AM. I think is the post have took me longer ever.
Later.